A therapy that helps establish a more profound ground for healthy relationship.

Here are five things relationships needs to survive.

  • Constant communication. Always communicate with your partner. …
  • Sharing the same values. Make sure your values align. …
  • Trust and honesty. Trust and honesty are extremely important. …
  • Sharing a sense of humor. …
  • Strong friendship and emotional intelligence

Here Are Things You Need To Do Before Getting Into a Lasting Relationship

Past learnings create an avenue for a golden future

If you are going to repeat the same mistakes, your relationship is most likely to meet the same fate. Analyze your previous relationship and be honest about the parts where your habits were to be blamed.

It could be spending too much time at work, going out with friends too often, overconsumption of alcohol, smoking, spendthrift-ness etc. As a matter of fact, 88% women find money to be an important part of a relationship.

Fixing these issues before springing up those three magical words is important. Regulate your drinking habits, attain a sustainable work-life balance, quit smoking, and manage finances better. These micro-changes aid the longevity of a relationship and improve your own outlook towards a positive life.

Leave the past behind

You have to accept the fact that your partner had a life before you. There are things they did, and decisions made they thought were right at that moment. Their decisions do not define them.

Fighting generally is good. It means both the parties involved care about each other enough. A study by the Florida State University found that couples who had angry but honest conversations got way ahead with their relationship. But arguing over someone’s past (which cannot be unchanged) is futile and may hollow out the relationship faster than you realize. If you feel like the other person’s past may prick you in the long run, evade immediately and do not get into a commitment.

Learn from those around you

We idolize individuals around us all the time. Everyone wishes to be a leader like Steve Jobs, or a genius like Elon Musk. It may help us become better people. In a similar way, learning from couples around us also helps.

When you learn from successful couples around you, you realize that things can be worked out with healthy communication and a tad bit of compromise. Not absolute sacrifice, but mild compromise.

Begin with you

It’s easy to have certain expectations from a partner. We want others to mould to our desires. From one’s interests to physical appearance, there happens to be a whole load of things people are “looking out” for. In fact, 53% of singles find a great smile to be the most attractive feature.

What we fail to look at is what are we offering to the relationship? How often do you find asking yourself, “am I really offering as much as I am expecting from this relationship?” Before getting into a relationship, make sure you are the best version of yourself. Before setting expectations, introspect whether you might be meeting your partner’s or not.

Make your life amazing for your partner

If you lead a boring life, how can you expect your partner to have fun? You need to get out of the rut and build a life you enjoy living. Be passionate about the things you love, and the excitement of your passion will rub off on your partner, too.

Over time, you will see that you and your partner begin synchronizing interests. It could be trying out Grape stomping, or running a readathon. These activities build stronger bonds between individuals, bringing them closer for longer. Having more memories to look back at helps retain the relationship when it goes through a rough time.

10 signs of a healthy relationship

Healthy relationships bring out the best in you and make you feel good about yourself. A healthy relationship does not mean a “perfect” relationship, and no one is healthy 100% of the time, but the signs below are behaviors you should strive for in all of your relationships.

Healthy relationships manifest themselves as healthy communication; another important part of a healthy relationship is loving yourself. Here are some characteristics and behaviors of a healthy relationship.

Comfortable Pace

The relationship moves at a speed that feels enjoyable for each person. It’s normal to want to spend a lot of time with someone when you first meet them, but it’s important that you’re both on the same page with how the relationship is moving. In a healthy relationship, you’re not rushed or pressured in a way that makes you feel overwhelmed.

Trust

Confidence that your partner won’t do anything to hurt you or ruin the relationship. In a healthy relationship, trust comes easily and you don’t have to question the other person’s intentions or whether they have your back. They respect your privacy and would never put you through a “test” to prove your loyalty.

Honesty

You can be truthful and candid without fearing how the other person will respond. In a healthy relationship, you should feel like you can share the full truth about your life and feelings with each other – you will never have to hide things. They may not like what you have to say, but will respond to disappointing news in a considerate way.

Independence

You have space to be yourself outside of the relationship. The other person should be supportive of your hobbies and your relationships with other friends, family and coworkers. The other person does not need to know or be involved in every part of your life. Having independence means being free to do you and giving your partner that same freedom.

Respect

You value one another’s beliefs and opinions, and love one another for who you are as a person. You feel comfortable setting boundaries and are confident that the other person will respect those boundaries. They cheer for you when you achieve something, support your hard work and dreams, and appreciate you.

Equality

The relationship feels balanced and everyone puts the same effort into the success of the relationship. You don’t let one person’s preferences and opinions dominate, and instead, you hear each other out and make compromises when you don’t want the same thing. You feel like your needs, wishes and interests are just as important as the other person’s. Sometimes you might put in more (money, time, emotional support) than your partner, and vice versa, but the outcome always feels equitable and even.

Kindness

You are caring and empathetic to one another, and provide comfort and support. In a healthy relationship, the other person will do things that they know will make you happy. Kindness should be a two-way street–it’s given and returned in your relationship. You show compassion for the other person and the things they care about.

Taking Responsibility

Owning your actions and words. You avoid placing blame and are able to admit when you make a mistake. You genuinely apologize when you’ve done something wrong and continually try to make positive changes to better the relationship. You can take ownership for the impact your words or behavior had, even if it wasn’t your intention.

Healthy Conflict

Openly and respectfully discussing issues and confronting disagreements non-judgmentally. Conflict is a normal and expected part of any relationship. Everyone has disagreements, and that’s OK! Healthy conflict is recognizing the root issue and addressing it respectfully before it escalates into something bigger. No one should belittle or yell during an argument.

Fun

You enjoy spending time together and you bring out the best in each other. A healthy relationship should feel easy and make you happy. You can let loose, laugh together, and be yourselves — the relationship doesn’t bring your mood down but cheers you up. No relationship is fun 100% of the time, but the good times should definitely outweigh the bad.

6 HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP HABITS MOST PEOPLE THINK ARE TOXIC

1. LETTING SOME CONFLICTS GO UNRESOLVED

Successful couples accept and understand that some conflict is inevitable, that there will always be certain things they don’t like about their partner, or things they don’t agree with–all that’s fine. You shouldn’t need to feel the need to change somebody in order to love them. And you shouldn’t let some disagreements get in the way of what is otherwise a happy and healthy relationship.

Sometimes, trying to resolve a conflict can create more problems than it fixes. Some battles are simply not worth fighting. And sometimes, the most optimal relationship strategy is one of live and let live.

2. BEING WILLING TO HURT EACH OTHER’S FEELINGS

When our highest priority is to always make ourselves feel good, or to always make our partner feel good, then more often than not nobody ends up feeling good. And our relationships fall apart without us even knowing it.

It’s important to make something more important in your relationship than merely making each other feel good all of the time. The feeling-good–the sunsets and puppies–they happen when you get the important stuff figured out: values, needs and trust.

If I feel smothered and want more time alone, I need to be capable of saying that without blaming her and she needs to be capable of hearing it without blaming me, despite the unpleasant feelings it may cause. If she feels that I’m cold and unresponsive to her, she needs to be capable of saying it without blaming me and I need to be capable of hearing it without blaming her, despite the unpleasant feelings it may generate.

3. BEING WILLING TO END IT

“Until death do us part” is romantic and everything, but when we worship our relationship as something more important than ourselves—more important than our values, than our needs and everything else in our lives—we create a sick dynamic where there’s no accountability.

We have no reason to work on ourselves and grow because our partner has to be there no matter what. And our partner has no reason to work on themselves and grow because we’re going to be there no matter what. This all invites stagnation and stagnation equals misery.

4. FEELING ATTRACTION FOR PEOPLE OUTSIDE THE RELATIONSHIP

When we commit to a person, we are not committing our thoughts, feelings or perceptions to them. We can’t control our thoughts, feelings, and perceptions most of the time, so how could we ever make that commitment?

What we can control are our actions. And what we commit to that special person are those actions. Let everything else come and go, as it inevitably will.

5. SPENDING TIME APART

The problem with allowing your identity to be consumed by a romantic relationship is that as you change to be closer to the person you love, you cease to be the person they fell in love with in the first place.

It’s important to occasionally get some distance from your partner, assert your independence, maintain some hobbies or interests that are yours alone. Have some separate friends; take an occasional trip somewhere by yourself; remember what made you you and what drew you to your partner in the first place.

Without this oxygen to breathe, the fire between the two of you will die out and what were once sparks will become only friction.

6. ACCEPTING YOUR PARTNER’S FLAWS

It may be our perfections that attract one another in the first place. But it’s our imperfections that decide whether or not we stay together.

It may be our perfections that attract one another in the first place. But it’s our imperfections that decide whether or not we stay together.

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